Exit My Life

I just woke from a month-long dream where everything
seemed to be close to the way it needed to be.
How are you supposed to feel when you have no idea
what is real anymore?
Do I exist?
Am I creating everything and everyone around me?
It can't be.
I would never intentionally make myself suffer like this.
I've been comatose with high hopes and cold hands
with no one to warm either of them.
I feel like I'm in the middle of the ocean with nothing
to grab on to.
I'm just wading violently in the throws of the sea with
a head full of nonsense that'll surely make me sink.
I want my head to be so clear that you can see through it.
Exit my life.
Exit everything you thought you knew about me.
I've been forced to question myself; my wit, my wisdom, my intelligence.
I might not be who I thought I was.
I've fallen in a trap and all my senses shut down.
I'm a hypocrite.
I always asked "Why the fuck would they do that?" or "How did he let that happen?"
when I would see this shit in the movies.
I've done it to myself. I see it's easier said than done.
Exit my life.